senior couple in bed

My spouse and I are 60. He takes Viagra and we are able to have intercourse. My problem is that all of our sex begins with him wanting oral. He will finish inside me. I don’t understand why we can’t have good ole missionary or something like that occasionally. It’s as if he can’t stay arroused with out his bj.


  • Michael Castleman says:

    You have every right to want intercourse in any position you enjoy it. But he has every right to want sex his way, too. I urge you to discuss this and negotiate a solution, perhaps taking turns, perhaps mixing intercourse and oral.

    Even with Viagra, many older men start to feel that intercourse takes too much effort. Oral—both giving and receiving—is often easier. For this reason, older couples who remain sexual generally evolve away from intercourse toward lovemaking based on mutual massage, hand jobs, oral, and sex toys. Now, if you want to keep intercourse in your repertoire, that’s fine. But you’ll have to assert yourself.

    I suggest you discuss this together. If he’s anxious about his erections, he might ask his doctor about taking a larger dose of Viagra. If he has back issues or other health concerns that make intercourse problematic, you can probably use pillows or repositioning to adjust things for his comfort. If you enjoy feeling filled and he’s less into doing the filling, perhaps he could use a dildo on you. There are plenty of possibilities. You just have to talk about this and figure out what works best for both of you.

    I wish you great sex.

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