Hello, I have a problem that has plagued me for years. Whenever I have sex or try to have sex with new partners, I either can’t get aroused or have real weak erections and perform terribly. With a girlfriend, regular sex partner etc, I never have this problem. I can attract women ok, I have a pretty good sense of humor, but my problem has cost me a lot of sexual opportunities. What would you suggest I do? I want to have more casual sex, one night stands, but this problem is standing in my way.

I hope you can answer my question its to do with my boyfriend watching porn,
I’ve never been against porn and believe that if i’m not around to pleasure a
man it’s okay, however recently whilst we were driving the screen flicked on
his phone to porn hub, and he asked me to flick it off, I was joking around
with him when i said no I want to see how many times a week you watch it and
it has been opened 7 times this week, hes a great lover and an amazing
boyfriend who I want to be my husband but all of a sudden i felt ashamed and
low and like i couldn’t please him. Were only in our late twenties so our sex
life is ongoing everyday but I feel like I don’t satisfy him or i am not
good, he says otherwise. He said that when I work long hours (Which i do
because i am a chef) he gets bored and isn’t creative to visualize himself
and I but i still can’t shake that I am not good enough. It really gets me
down knowing that he needs to masturbate even when we have sex pretty much
once a day and It’s killing me thinking that I’m not enough for him. I’ve
been cheated on by all 4 past long term partners and know he will never do
that ..I presume this is why I am having an issue however I don’t want to I
want to be secure and not care but do I just need to get over it or what
should I do.

We seem to have a third sex that society has now recognized. Do you think that the Shemale can be the new sex partner for the couple looking for new adventures?? Do you think attraction to them by couples is the simple way to have something for the both the man and the woman? And if you have discussed this with T-Girls, how do they perceive themselves within our sexual world ??

Why do there seem to be more of them in 2nd & 3rd world countries. I understand the XY issue but is there a trend to see more today than 30 years ago ?? I had a date with a beautiful woman, but when we showered together, I got the shock of my life. My mind was not prepared to see just the woman in the shower with me but a woman who had my parts too. Do you feel that they should tell their partner before things get to this point ?? Her face was that of an angel with beautiful natural breasts, but then the male parts just seemed to be a wet blanket. But she had lovely hips and a woman’s back and butt. We stayed friends throughout college and discussed the world she was trapped in. It was a very sad story.

Your thoughts on this issue.


Am I missing something ?? Through out your published works I find the subject of G-spot very rare. I have been married 2 times and then decided that this was enough. But I was able to increase my sexual weekly pleasure many many times over. I discovered that using my fingers in the woman’s vagina and rubbing her G spot with variation was the perfect stimulation to make her orgasm. For those men who are asking where it is this is where I find it. When inserting 2 fingers in her wet vagina run gently on the upper side of it and feel for a raised roughened quarter raised rough area about 2-3 inches into her. When you have found it she will let you know in several ways and I always ask them to say ” That’s Perfect ! ”
I always suggest those little talks about location and sensation. Guys rub that spot with some gentle pressure and note her reaction. Lay between her legs and close to her labia for this reason : As in the real estate business the saying works for great sex for her too.
” Location, Location, Location. ” As you see and feel her become more vocal lick her clitoris with the hood pulled back. You will probably get the OMG response.

( Women Talk to Other Women ! )

Pull her hood back with your thumb and lick the most sensitive nerve in her body and suck on it. Since the fingers of your right hand are in her then use the left hand to do the exterior work and also your tongue. You can stop doing all of that and then switch to massaging her nerve fill labia major. ( the stop will make them more excited and wanting ) Squeeze them gently and firmly off and on and massage them their full length on both sides of the vulva. The more time you spending doing this the better orgasms she might have.

Then return to massaging and licking her clit a little more then do this: Push down with your left hand on her mound ( pubic bone ) as you increase the pressure upward on her G spot. This should make it very easy to make you lady orgasm. But after her first orgasm I always ask them to tell me when she wants to stop the orgasms and give you your attention.

When I was married I was forbidden fruit and some women want a bite of that apple. But after I became divorced I had knowledge with women and remembered what I had achieved for my wives and then did something that most men would never do and I was lucky. I had 2 loves who knew each other and having wine one night with the two I asked them my most fearsome question and got the yes answer from both. I asked them if I could make one orgasm while they both told me what to do and put all that info into memory.

Over many months of learning what they had liked I got my full library. I was lucky to have 2 teachers and lovers because their styles and likes were different sometimes. That did not confuse me because women are emotionally different and not physically consistent because of stress. I learned Yoni massage and other techniques to get them physically and emotionally relaxed and the world pushed to the side for awhile.

I hope this all gave you something to try and perfect and I assure you that your lady will guide you too. Good Luck and you relax too.

Michael what do you think of this technique ??

We’ve been married since Valentine’s Day this year. Now he is playing alone and lying about it. It’s ruining this new marriage before we get started. He’s masturbating every morning after I leave for work. I cant handle his lying. I cannot trust him. Why does he have to lie? I don’t understand at all. I used to masturbate when I was single, but find no need for my toys now that I’m with him. That’s part of getting married. isn’t it? I feel betrayed.

My husband is 77 and has problems keeping an erection but he will sneak and watch porn and masturbate but will not try any type of sex with me. I recently made the move and did oral sex and was successful but it took a very long time. How can I encourage him to have sex without intercourses? He does not know I am aware of what he is doing. He is loving and we snuggle and kiss but I am afraid to push him into sex if it’s not what he wants. I still have a strong sex drive. Why does he hide what he is doing?

My husband & I are newlyweds, new to sex together, and can’t figure out how to have sex doggy style. Have had some laughs, but just wind up confused. It seems as though if I’m on my hands and knees, I’m too high up for him, or he’s hanging down too low to get in…If I’m flat on my belly, he just can’t seem to find his way in that way, either. How difficult can this be! LOL He’s 6’1, I’m 5’5″; are our heights a problem? He has less prior sexual experience than I do, and I’ve never had this happen before. We also struggle with ED which sucks, but we’re trying to figure out what to do. So far, Viagra and Cialis, as well as “natural” OTC supplements, are 50/50 successful. Vacuum pump hurts him and doesn’t maintain erection. I am 47 and his is 60. Thank you for your help. I’m glad I found your site.

Can I regain real and honest intimacy with my wife after finding out that she’s been communicating with her former boyfriend?

Hi Michael. Can you give any advice to help me help my wife get to the climax part of orgasm? We’ve recently really committed to 40-plus minutes of clitoral stimulation before any intercourse. She loves the attention. About 30 minutes in, she quivers all over her legs and belly twitch more intensely than she has ever done with intercourse She seems to get almost there before she says it starts to tickle too much and i have to stop and she doesn’t get to that peak and release equivalent to when I ejaculate. It’s never painful for her, just a sudden onset of overly intense sensitivity.

We’ve recently started using a magic wand vibrator, which takes her to more even more intense twitch and quivering and some occasional full body contractions which she says is more pleasure than she’s ever got before. That’s good. But still, we have to end things when she becomes overly ticklish before sensing any big climax and release. I want so bad for her to come fully. I tell her her body is working exactly like it was designed as she gives all the right build up responses including puffy inner lips which indicates she seems to be getting good blood flow. Should we just keep trying? Is it a blood flow thing? Is there a medical or medicinal boost? It is my technique? She’s so close and we are more determined than ever to get there. Anything to help us over the hump would be a dream come true

Hi Michael can you please address how women can feel comfortable with porn given the abusive and degrading nature of so much porn? Especially with all the research showing how it impacts the self confidence of women and professor Dines recent research showing 88% of mainstream
Porn shows women being called demeaning names and being hit , spat on or slapped , along with other research which im sure your up to date with. It’s easy to say men have always looked at porn but it’s simply not true that men have ever at any time had access to the highly demeaning easy access porn available in modern times. Why are so many men comfortable and aroused seeing women degraded and why ‘should’ women feel ok about men using material that treats women as less than human?