Free Q&A Archive

I read something you wrote that made a lot of sense, but also left me with a
question. To paraphrase my understanding, you said that men have shown a
wide-ranging variety of preferences for female body types (beyond the Barbie-doll Playboy depiction) as evidenced by the many body types presented on porn websites. Here’s my question:

Do you think ideal female body type preferences held by males who came of age
during the Playboy era were influenced by the body types shown in Playboy and
similar magazines?

Everybody talks about desensitzing the penis when it comes to premature ejaculation. My problem is that I don’t think about how good it feels, but looking at my wife makes me ejaculate quicker. Such as looking at her breasts shake or her face tense up. Doggie style is the worst because I see her breasts dangling and within an instant I get to the point of no return and I ejaculate. I can’t find any information about about the visualizing just the sensitivity. I feel that I should close my eyes and think about something completely different. Although alcohol is not a good prescription, it definitely does help. I am just over forty and my premature ejaculation is worse now than when I was in my 20’s.

Usually when I have sex, I try to get as deep into women as possible. Yesterday I was with a woman and I had to back off a little bit. It was hard to stay in. She said she was small and tight. And her hole was all the way down towards the back, farther back than I’ve ever seen. Maybe this person had a sex change or something….  Is this normal?

Can a man perform sexually and reach orgasm if he is not sexually attracted to his partner?

I see you’re another sex expert who dismisses the reality of penis enlargement. Frankly, I don’t care whether you believe me or not, but I have been using a compression hanger (it’s called a BIB) to hang weights on my flaccid penis on & off for many years. My flaccid length when I first measured it, which was several years after I started was 3 1/2″. It is now 5 3/8″ My erect length which has been measured the same way started at 5 1/2″ and is now 7 1/8″. While hanging is not specifically intended to increase girth, my starting girth was 5 1/4″ and is now 5 15/16″ If I had been consistent, I know my results would have even been better ,but something, like a couple of moves or a death in the family, can happen and when you stop for a while, you can’t just go back to the amount of time you were hanging or to the weight. You have to slowly work back up and it’s only until I’m hanging ~17 +lbs in 20 minute sessions that add up to at least 10 hrs/week that I make any gains. I’m now in my 70s, am intimate with my gal several times/week and although there’s not multiple orgasms in a session anymore and my ejaculate volume is way down, my erect cock is hard as a rock and our lovemaking is wonderful. Now of course I eat clean, lift weights and indulge in numerous types of CV activities, none the less, this works.
Take care
M

Can I, an 80-year-old man, enjoy tantric masturbation even when flaccid? My usual penile posture!

Hi, I recently read your article “the real problem with porn, it’s bad for sex” and I was actually relieved that someone from the psychology world is addressing some of the problems with porn; thank you for this thorough and very helpful information. My question is this, what would it look like to address women’s pain and suffering as the real problem? Is our pain not valid in itself? Are men not capable of seeing women’s suffering for what it really is? Is the porn industry above reprimand for apparently helping lower sex crime? I see porn as a problem because it is degrading to relationships. It has hijacked men’s brains and poisoned and debilitated them. It has objectified and degraded women. It has caused undue stress in my daily life and I have found very little validation to fuel my fight. How does it look to validate and address this pain as the real problem? I hope to gain some perspective from your professional insights. Thank you!

Is Trimix gel safe and effective ?

Hi, I’m contacting you because I’m confused about my libido. I didn’t lose my virginity until I was 18, I stopped having sex when I reached 19. My libido went down, and had no interest in sex at all. I never used to think about it, or want to do it. I’m 27 soon, and I’m not sure why but since I’ve reached my late 20s, I can’t stop thinking about sex!! Nearly everyday, to the point I’m willing to meet men for one night stands. Why could this be please? And thank you!

For years I took ED meds – Viagra, Cialis, and Levitra – with excellent results. Lately, they don’t work at all. Is this phenomenon typical, inevitable? If the answer is that the body adjusts itself out of the range of efficacy, does this adjustment also happen with medications taken for other purposes? I’m 63, and I’m curious in a scientific way. What can I do?