I’m a male, 72, and have had erection problems for at least 15 years. I’m in reasonably good physical shape, but over weight by about 80 lbs (muscular). I have a very good libido, tried Viagra, and tadalafil (5 mg/day — 20/mg as a booster for sexual activity) with no results. My partner is 73. She is extremely constantly wet and very sexually inclined. I walk 2 miles a day and exercise with weights. I’m not on medication except for cholesterol. I’m good with oral and hand stimulation for both male and female. We hug’n kiss. I grab for her constantly as she walks by, and enjoy making her cum even with no erection. I can still ejaculate. I suspect, contrary to some of the literature, that my erection will not return due to age, even with weight loss. I don’t smoke. Or, drink to any appreciable degree. Should I try marajuana?
I’m thinking that perhaps a Ultrasound test might be the ticket to establish the quality of blood flow in the penis; and for heart reasons as well. With this Clouseau approach, can I gain enough clues to resurrect the erection?
FYI: I’ve enjoyed your articles. At 72, knowing that an erection is difficult (specifically, not going to happen), has had an effect on love making. The women I seek out are vintage as am I. But there is always the expectation that Tarzan has to perform. I stopped seeing one woman because, at 75, she wanted significant intercourse. In earlier times, I would have jumped at the chance. With the present circumstances, I stepped on the cat and jumped out the window. At one point I considered getting a pump placed in the scrotum like a 73 year old friend of mine who had a prostate removal. But, of course, that made no sense from a risk standpoint, and while he has been able to conceal the pump from his partners, I don’t see how this is accomplished if fellatio is employed.
Your articles helped put things in perspective as to a woman’s desire for intercourse vs. oral, and the fact that most men fight to keep their erection going, and eventually lose the battle. Lastly, I masturbate as my Jiminy Cricket allows, and watching porn is also on the menu. Any additional insight that you can provide to move me along Route 66 would be appreciated.
Thank you for your kind words about my work. After age 70, only around 10% of men can still raise erections without medications, so sadly, your changes of resurrection are small. But there are still several approaches that might help you enjoy sex more:
• You’ve tried Viagra and Cialis without benefit. But there’s another erection drug made from the bark of the West African yohimbe tree, a traditional male sexual booster. Yohimbe drugs are FDA approved. You might ask your doctor to prescribe one of them: Yohimbine, Yocon, Aphrodyne.
• There’s an up-and-coming new treatment for ED—low impact shockwave therapy (LIST). It breaks up adhesions in the penile arteries that limit blood flow, and several studies show substantial benefits for many men. The downside: It’s still considered experimental, so few if any health insurers pay for it. But free-standing clinics have sprung up around the country that offer it for a cost in the range of $1-2,000.
• It’s great that you walk so much, but being 80 lbs overweight usually impairs arterial function, including those that carry blood into the penis. You might ask your doctor about a medically supervised weight-loss program.
• Most older couples are like you. The men have increasing difficulty accomplishing intercourse, and the women are postmenopausal and often bothered by vaginal dryness and atrophy (tissue thinning) that can make intercourse uncomfortable even with copious lubrication. So most older couples do what you’ve done. They evolve away from intercourse toward hand jobs and oral sex. Those who still want intercourse usually use dildos. Either the man uses one on the woman, or he uses a strap-on dildo that encourages the hip-thrusting of intercourse. You might try a strap-on.
• About marijuana. It doesn’t do anything for erections, but most studies show that around two-thirds of people who make love on cannabis report more enjoyable sex.
• Finally, for more on later-life erection issues, you might consider ordering a copy of my new book, Sizzling Sex for Life: How to Maximize Erotic Pleasure at Any Age. It comes out in early January, but can be pre-ordered now: https://www.amazon.com/Sizzling-Sex-Life-Everything-Maximize/dp/1510762558.
I wish you sizzling sex for life!