My girlfriend wants me to lick her asshole. She says it’s fantastic. Really? I was married for 23 years and thought my late wife and I had a fairly adventurous sex life, but we never did that, and I’m not sure how I feel about it. Is it clean? Safe?
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The usual terms for this are rimming and analingus, Many people find it sexually exciting for either or both of two reasons. Anal play is often considered taboo and some people get turned on by forbidden fruit. In addition, the anus is richly endowed with touch-sensitive nerves, and the wet softness of a tongue on the sphincter can provide erotic pleasure.
Of course, the anal area may be contaminated by fecal material and digestive bacteria (E. coli). But if the recipient (or that person’s lover) washes the area with soap and water, it can be as clean as the mouth during deep kissing. You might want to shower with your girlfriend before you make love.
Is rimming safe? If the recipient’s anal area has been thoroughly washed, yes it is.
Now, you’re under no obligation to provide analingus if you’d rather not. No one should ever feel pressured sexually. But if you’re open to the idea, you may find you enjoy it, both giving and receiving. For more on rimming, read Rimming (Analingus): The Curious Lovers’ Guide to Oral-Anal Contact.
note to the questioner: as Michael says, shower with your partner and wash her back there so you know it is clean, and then enjoy a very sensual and intimate experience. I think once you get over the ‘dirt’ fear, t will bring you close.