Sad man with coffee and smartphone at restaurant

Hi, my erection was fine, then 6 months before my marriage, I received treatment for baldness from a dermatologist who prescribed “finasteride 1 mg” for 3 months. I took it for 2 months and started experiencing loss of erection even though I was aroused. My quality of sperm become similar to a transparent sticky fluid. Immediately I stopped taking that tablet, but then  nothing changed. I checked with the doctor. He said my erection difficulty was a temporary effect of finasteride that would go away soon. Anyhow, I married. On my wedding night, I couldn’t do it, no erection at all. I was so disappointed. I tried Viagra. It worked…but I wanna get erections without any drugs, so I tried again the next day without Viagra, but no. I started experiencing erectile dysfunction again and again. I managed to impregnate my wife after 1 year of marriage, and started experiencing morning erections again, but they are not as hard as in the past. I can have erections when I’m aroused, but each and every time, I need to involve myself in maximum stimulation to achieve erection. I can’t get erections just by touching and kissing.

I’m worried:
1. Will my future kids be healthy? Since I feel finasteride might have caused my sperm quality very low.
2. I’m only 28 anI have to strive hard in order to have sex. Will I be able to get erections when I’m in my 30s, 40s, 50s?

And one more thing. Sometimes I will get hard erections without any reason and it stays erect for 20-30 mins. But when I need it, I can’t get erect. Is my psychology running my life? If yes, then how to get rid of this psychological ED? Please help me. I’m so worried that sometimes I go in depression.

Thanks, please help me sir…I will be very thankful to u.


  • Michael Castleman says:

    Yes, finasteride can contribute to erection difficulties. You were right to stop taking it. Doctors rarely mention the possibility of ED when they prescribe finasteride, and they should.

    I’m very sorry that you had a disappointing wedding night. You are by no means alone. Erections are very sensitive to stress, alcohol, and fatigue. Weddings are happy events, but they also generate considerable stress. Stress reduces blood flow into the penis, and can hurt erection. Meanwhile, chances are that by the end of your wedding celebration, you were inebriated and very tired. Alcohol is a major erection killer, and so is fatigue. It sounds like your wedding night problem aggravated your stress, which in turn, hurt your erections even more.

    So you took VIagra and it worked. I’m not surprised. Viagra pushes more blood into the penis. Then you stopped it and you were back to ED. Not surprising. Your stressing about your erections was unchanged.

    Meanwhile, you raise spontaneous erections when you’re not having sex. This proves that your erection reflex is fine. The problems are your stress level and your belief that you can’t become erect without a drug.

    Here’s what I suggest:
    • Please understand that it’s probably your stress level that’s hurting your erections.
    • To de-stress, I urge you to take a hot bath or shower before sex. That’s relaxing. Engage in more foreplay before you attempt intercourse, like 30 minutes or so of gently touching your wife all over, from her scalp to her toes, and she should provide the same gentle touch for you. Extended gentle touch supports erection.
    • Do not drink any alcohol within two or three hours of sex. Alcohol is the world’s biggest erection killer.
    • Purchase a copy of my book, Sizzling Sex for Life. It contains a half-dozen articles about all aspects of erection. It also contains more than 100 articles that can help you and your wife enjoy better sex. And as your sex improves, that should help you relax, and the relaxation should help your erections.

    Will your kids be healthy? I certainly hope so. If your wife is getting adequate prenatal care, things should be fine. But again, anxiety about your kids’ health hurts your erections.

    Will you be able to raise erections at 40? 50? If you approach sex the way I recommend in my book, you should be fine.

    My book should help you and your wife solve your problem. But if not, then I’d urge you and your wife to consult a sex therapist. Sex therapy usually takes four to six months of weekly one-hour sessions. It costs $150-200/hour, though many therapists discount fees for those who can’t afford standard rates. If you’re unfamiliar with sex therapy, clients DON’T have sex with therapists and therapists DON’T watch clients having sex. For more, read my book, and/or see the film, “Hope Springs” with Meryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones. To find a sex therapist near you, visit the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists, the Society for Sex Therapy and Research, or the American Board of Sexology.

    But I doubt you’ll need sex therapy. I’m guessing that all you need is a more relaxed approach to lovemaking. Good luck!

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