Senior couple embracing lying in bed

I’ve had a great sex life with my boyfriend, he was diagnosed with prostate cancer. After the first hormone shot, everything changed. What can be expected going forward? Will we be able to regain some of the physical pleasure? Will we ever be able to have intercourse again?


  • Michael Castleman says:

    I’m sorry to hear about his cancer and your changed sex lives.

    Will he ever have erections sufficient for intercourse? Maybe, but don’t count on it. Will the two of you be able to experience erotic pleasure if he can no longer raise erections? Absolutely YES, with a few adjustments, for example, lovemaking without intercourse.

    For more, I suggest you read my low-cost article, Sex After Prostate Cancer. It deals mostly with surgery and radiation, but as I understand things, hormone therapy has similar impact on sexual function. However, because hormone therapy does not damage the erection nerves, he may have better-than-average success with an erection drug.

    I also suggest that you read another low-cost article, Great Sex Without Intercourse. Like I said, it’s an adjustment to bid farewell to intercourse, an adjustment that can take many months. But sex without intercourse can be just as satisfying—and men don’t need erections to have fabulous orgasms. That’s right, in a loving context with extended manual and oral stimulation (hand job, blow job), men with semi-firm or even completely flaccid penises can still enjoy marvelous orgasms.

    Beyond my articles, you may also benefit from sex therapy. If your unfamiliar with sex therapy, read my low-cost article, An Intimate Look at Sex Therapy, and/or see the movie Hope Springs with Meryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones. To find a sex therapist near you, visit the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists, the Society for Sex Therapy and Research, or the American Board of Sexology.

    Change is difficult. Sexual changes are even more so. But no matter how much or how little erection function he recovers down the road, you CAN still enjoy hot, juicy, mutually orgasmic, very satisfying sex.

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