Free Q&A Archive

My 49-year-old boyfriend and I have not had sex in over a year. He says he has lost his desire for sex but wishes he could make love to me. He has told me his doctor says it is due to depleted dopamine levels. He used to use drugs and is clean 7 years, during which we have had sex until the past year. I figure the doctor’s poor prognosis is a story, an excuse. Recently he told me that he still enjoys masturbating regularly and insisted it’s not ED. I assume it was his way of telling me he can get erect, just not with me. What’s going on?

I’m 57 and have premature ejaculation. What can I do for it?

I am young man of 24. I’ve been experiencing erectile dysfunction. I have a painless pile (hemorrhoids). I want to know whether is the pile might be causing the weak erection.

I want to help my friend. He his 40 years old and can’t have erections.

My man ALWAYS wants rougher sex than I desire. I constantly feel like we are having porno sex. He says there is no such thing. I believe he really just doesn’t know better. He used to watch a lot of porn and no longer does because of my objections. He claims that it is his age that requires more intense stimulation for orgasm. Condoms caused issues he says (I think that is nonsense but we stopped using them years ago anyway). He says he needs oral sex to  even get an erection, which is nonsense because I rarely do (I know I’m selfish and lazy). I am significantly younger and have not had children, so my vagiga isn’t the problem. I believe that his years of watching porn has conditioned him to desiring and always having rough sex (And kinky sex, which I’m not into). I’d like an opinion from a thoughtful middle age man, as all my young female friends who date older men agree with me, as well as gay male friends who date older men. I’m tired of porno sex! I’d like to be made love to and not always feel like an object, but he sees no difference. I have asked him to slow down and he does often loose his erection. Is sensual sex forever a lost cause because of his porn conditioning or is it really desensitization because of age?

I am 33 & my ‘new’ boyfriend is 43. I love him a lot and think the world of him. However, lately his erectile dysfunction is creating problems in our relationship. He is amazing at all non-intercourse sex but the problem comes with intercourse.

He cannot seem to ‘find’ his way, I help guide him. Once he’s in he cannot seem to hold an erection. Only when I am able to ‘ride’ him, he may be able to sustain erection for a bit.

He is able to come via oral sex, or masturbation. I don’t know how to help him other than being supportive and caring. But to be honest, I am under 40 and want more intercourse than he can provide. What is a solution?

As you have written, vagina quickly gets normal tightness after sometime of having sex, but my wife still has loose vagina 20 hours after sex with me. Does it mean she has had sex with someone else after lovemaking with me. Please resolve my doubt.

I am 18 years old but am already feeling the effects of premature ejaculation. I broke up with my girlfriend partly because she was unsatisfied with my performance. I believe it is attributed to both masturbation and pornography. But my question is, do you need a partner to complete your program, or can it be done on your own? Thanks so much!

As I get older, it takes longer to get hard again after orgasm/ejaculation. Are there any studies about shortening the refractory period? Are there any effective treatments such as exercises, herbs, medications, etc.?

My boyfriend and I haven’t been together very long. We had sex for the first time not too long ago and it brought up some ongoing issues he has with Premature Ejaculation (PE). He hasn’t been in a relationship in quite some time and he says that 95% of the time when this happens, it was when he had had a couple drinks. I’ve never encountered anything like this and was unsure of how to be supportive. I’m not sure what to say that will still uphold his manhood. In my eyes, I’m not bothered at all by this issue. I’ts still early and I realize we still need more time to be comfortable with each other. Maybe that was my first mistake. Nonetheless, if there are any words of wisdom you may have for me, i would greatly appreciate them. Thank-you!