I am 80 wife is 75. I can’t maintain an erection, but can still ejaculate. I would like to give my wife sexual pleasure. How can I best have sex at 80?


  • Michael Castleman says:

    Sex at 75 and 80 is rather like exercise at 75 and 80. You can still exercise at your age, but it’s not like it was when you were 25 and 30. After around 50, and certainly by 70 or so, intercourse drops out of the picture. Men can’t raise erections any more (even with the drugs), and women experience vaginal changes that make intercourse uncomfortable and perhaps impossible (even with lubricants). But while intercourse fades away, mutual erotic pleasure need not. Instead of intercourse, older lovers generally opt for mutual whole-body massage, genital massage (hand jobs), oral sex, and sex toys, particularly vibrators (with lubricant). I urge you to experiment with these options. Start by reading the article, Great Sex Without Intercourse.

    Since you asked about giving your wife pleasure, I urge you to read the article, Orgasms During Intercourse – Improving Women’s Chances. The fact is, only 25 percent of women are consistently orgasmic from intercourse. So even for couples who can have intercourse, it’s not the key to pleasure for most women. For erotic fulfillment, most women need whole-body massage (massage lotion helps), gentle genital hand massage (with lubricant), oral caresses, and vibrators (with lube).

    Speaking of massage, a good introduction is the article, Whole-Body Massage: The “Language” of Great Sex. I’d also recommend the article, Caressing Women: Advanced Erotic Tips for Men. To increase both of your pleasure giving and receiving oral sex, I suggest Oral Sex: Enhancement Suggestions for Men and Women. If you’re not currently incorporating a vibrator into your lovemaking, I urge you to try one. Three articles should help: Introducing Sex Toys into Partner Sex, Vibrator Myths vs. Truth, and The Best Vibrator for You. Finally, lubricants improve sex at any age, but they become necessities for elderly lovers. Read Lubricants: The Slippery Secret of Sensational Sex At Any Age.

    Sex at your age requires some adjustments, but they’re relatively minor adjustments. Where there’s a will, there’s always a way. Enjoy!

  • Ernest says:

    Ask your doctor to prescribe you Viagra if your health and medications allow it.

    And you will enjoy sex better than you were a young inexperienced guy

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