Please give me hints or tips on how I can arouse my woman before we make love.
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Please give me hints or tips on how I can arouse my woman before we make love.
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© 2009 - 2024 Michael Castleman
First, I urge you to read the two articles on women’s desire: Women’s Many Possible Sexual Response Cycles and Desire in Women: Does It Lead to Sex? Or Result From It? In the vast majority of men, desire comes first. Men want sex and go after it. But many women feel differently. They approach sex feeling erotically neutral, but good sex turns them on and by the time things get hot and heavy, they feel desire.
As a result, you may not be able to arouse your lover BEFORE sex, but as kissing and cuddling progresses to undressing, if you’re a good lover, you may well arouse her. How? By doing the OPPOSITE of what you see in porn. In porn, there’s no foreplay. It’s all genital all the time. But real women not only enjoy foreplay, for many, playful touching all over is absolutely necessary for them to become aroused. In porn, the action is fast and furious. But real women prefer a much slower pace. In fact, in bed, move at half speed. Do everything slowly and sensually with lots of whole-body massage. Don’t rush into genital sex. Savor the whole body. The article to read is: The Real Problem with Pornography: It’s Bad for Sex.
In addition, I urge you to read these articles: Caressing Women: Advanced Erotic Tips for Men, No One “Gives” Anyone an Orgasm, Women Know Best: Men Should Heed Women’s Sexual Wisdom, Lubricants: The Slippery Secret of Sensational Sex, Whole-Body Massage: The “Language” of Lovemaking, and Forget “Foreplay.” Your lover might also like to incorporate a vibrator into your lovemaking. If that feels odd to you, then read Introducing Sex Toys into Partner Sex.