Starting just in the last month, I notice that my circumsized penis has shrunk such that the head has retracted into what little residual foreskin remains. My penis has always been short, but this condition is new to me. My observation is that my flaccid penis seems smaller than it used to be. My wife of 30 years and I have intercourse about every 7 days. I always take Cialis about one hour prior. Because it seems to me that having sex too frequently is associated with ejaculation failure, I sometimes wait another day or two. I have not ejaculated in intercourse for about three weeks now. I ask my wife to vibrate me to orgasm. This is getting humiliating. Perhaps there are physical or psychological reasons linking the shrinking penis and failure to ejaculate during intercourse. It is a fact that after giving my wife a massage, I get an erection sufficient to insert it, but lately, it goes limp on me, and I cannot have an orgasm, which is new. I am an otherwise very healthy retired 77-year-old clinical psychologist, who works out vigorously at the gym three days a week.


  • Michael Castleman says:

    Your problem is common but seldom discussed. Flaccid or erect, penis size depends on the amount of blood flowing through the organ’s central spongy tissues. If less blood flows, size decreases. That’s what happens with age and certain medical conditions. The arteries that carry blood into the penis become (1) narrowed by atherosclerotic plaques, (2) or stiff from loss of smooth muscle resilience, or (3) both, all of which reduce blood flow through the penis. Meanwhile, the nerves that control the muscles that control arterial openness (dilation) lose some of their oomph and that, too, reduces blood flow into the penis. Twenty years ago, your flaccid penis contained more blood than it does today, hence you’ve noticed the head retracting. For more on this, read the article on Penis Size.

    You say that penis retraction has caused you some anxiety. That makes sense. I think your anxiety has contributed to, if not caused, your recent ejaculation and erection problems. Anxiety contributes to both, and in a situation where your primary complaint is sexual, i.e. disappearing penis, it makes biological and poetic sense that the ancillary issues would also be sexual in nature.

    Your commitment to exercise has certainly helped preserve optimal blood flow. Guys who are sedentary, or who smoke or have diabetes often report problems like yours much earlier in life, starting in the 50s. So you’ve held up very well. But you’re now in distress and I feel for you.

    What to do? I’m not sure anything can be done about your penis retracting into the foreskin. I just don’t know, sorry. You might consult a urologist.

    As for your other issues, it’s possible that knowing what’s caused your retraction might relieve enough anxiety to clear things up. You might also read the articles on erection and ejaculation problems.

    And if you still need assistance, then I’d urge you to look into sex therapy. I bet a few months of weekly consultations would help. For more about sex therapy read the article about it. To find a sex therapist near you, visit the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists, the Society for Sex Therapy and Research, or the American Board of Sexology.

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