Recently, my group of friends and I were hanging out and talking about several things, one of them were experiences with women. And someone mentioned the fornix. Up until that point, I never heard of it, so I decided to investigate. Now, I am aware that penis size is generally not important for women. But this topic hooked my interest. First, because I didn’t find much info on it. And second, I am worried that this ends up being true and the anterior and posterior fornix are some sort of special orgasmic spot for women. That they are places that I can’t reach with my penis—which makes me feel anxious. Specially the posterior fornix (which I have heard it feels better than the anterior fornix and is deeper). So, is it true? Does stimulating the fornix really feel good to women?
Everyone is sexually unique. While there are patterns in human sexual responses, many people don’t fit them. The only way to know if any touch produces pleasure or discomfort is to ASK your partner(s). Try: “Is this OK?”
Now I’ll explain why I bet very few women would find fornix stimulation erotic. The fornix is the area where the cervix protrudes into the back of the vagina. As you discovered, there are two fornices—front (anterior) and back (posterior).
Most men derive tremendous sexual pleasure from vaginal intercourse, and assume that women do, too. Now most women enjoy gentle, well lubricated intercourse, especially the special closeness of holding men inside them. During intercourse, men come around 95% of the time. But few women have orgasms from intercourse alone. I repeat: For women, orgasms during intercourse are more the exception than the rule. Why? The vagina, especially the back of the vagina where the fornix is located, contains few erotically sensitive nerve endings. Women’s erotic nerves are concentrated in the clitoris, the little nub of tissue that sits OUTSIDE the vagina, an inch or so above it under the top junction of the vaginal lips. If you want the women in your bed to come, provide plenty of gentle, patient, extended clitoral caressing—especially oral sex (cunnilingus). Many studies show that women are most likely to come with a combination of whole-body massage (for 20 minutes or more), intercourse, and after they’ve become aroused from those two, extended cunnilingus to get them to orgasm.
In addition, many women say that when men reach or insert erections or toys deep enough inside the vagina and touch the cervix, it feels uncomfortable. Ask how your lover(s) feel(s) about this.
Add it all up, and I bet most women wouldn’t care for fornix stimulation and might very well find it uncomfortable. Few women like their cervix touched, and it’s difficult to caress the fornices without touching it. And most women get most of their sexual pleasure—and orgasms—from gentle clitoral caressing.
My advice: Focus on whole-body massage to help women warm up to lovemaking. And once they’re aroused, focus your attention—especially your lips and tongue—on the clitoris. For more on women’s arousal, sexual pleasure, and orgasm, check out my book, Sizzling Sex for Life.