Anal Beads
Think of a pearl necklace, only the “pearls” are about the size of grapes and strung farther apart. When these beads are well-lubricated and inserted into or withdrawn from a well-lubricated anus, the action can bring intense erotic pleasure. In anal play, the focus is typically on the anal canal—inserting a finger, penis, or toy in there. Unfortunately, the anal sphincter often gets neglected. Stimulation of this erotic opening can produce intensely pleasurable sensations because the pelvic floor muscles, which are involved in erotic pleasure and orgasm, surround the anus. Anal beads are a way to explore anal sphincter pleasure. Make sure that both the beads and the anus are well-lubricated. Then insert the beads slowly, one at a time. Remove them the same way—slowly. Savor how they gently open the anus and how the sphincter closes after each bead has been inserted or withdrawn. Insert and withdraw just one or two beads if you wish, or the entire strand. The recipient may also wear the beads internally, providing an erotic secret that some couples enjoy.
Anal Dildo (Butt plug)
Any non-vibrating cylindrical toy designed for insertion into the anus and/or rectum. Just as lovers derive pleasure from inserting a dildo into a woman’s vagina or a man’s or woman’s mouth, some also enjoy playing with a dildo in the anus. Any dildo can be introduced into the back door. But anal dildos tend to be slimmer for greater comfort. Most have flared bases to prevent loss inside the anal canal. Look for the flared base. It’s a safety feature. Materials vary: latex, Cyberskin, silicone, or jelly. Some are short and slim, for anal beginners. Others are longer and wider. Some vibrate. Others inflate. Whatever your anal pleasure, there’s a butt plug to enhance it. If you use an anal dildo be sure to use plenty of lubricant on both the plug and the anus. After using an anal dildo, don’t introduce it into any other erotic opening without thoroughly washing it with soap and water.
Artificial Vagina
See Men’s Masturbator or Sleeve
Baby Doll
An item of women’s lingerie that includes a skirt. Who says sexy means as skimpy as possible? Sometimes a little extra coverage can be a special turn-on, especially when what’s covered is south of the navel and invites further exploration. Wearing a silky erotic skirt can make a woman feel very alluring. And lifting it can drive men wild. Babydolls are dress-like and typically cover the thighs. They also include panties, a thong, or G-string. But styles differ considerably. Some are lacy and see-through. Others are more opaque. Some are two-piece (panty and dress). Some have three pieces (panty, dress, bra). And some include little extras (matching hat, wristlets, gloves).
Ben-Wa Balls/Vibro Balls
A pair of plum-sized spheres meant to be inserted into the vagina to intensify woman’s orgasms by strengthening the PC muscle in the lower pelvis. Ben-Wa balls are the most misunderstood sex toy. Many people believe this ancient Asian toy is supposed to be used during intercourse for enhancement, and then feel frustrated when the balls don’t make intercourse more fun. Ben-wa balls may be used during intercourse if you enjoy playing that way. But the original idea was for the woman to try to hold the balls inside her vagina, not when making love, but rather, during everyday activities. At first, the balls fall out, so initially you want to wear them discreetly just around the house. But after a while, many women learn to hold ben wa balls inside them. To do this, a woman has to strengthen her PC muscle, the one she contracts to interrupt urine flow or to squeeze out the last few drops. The PC is also one of the main muscles that contracts during orgasm. Learning how to hold ben-wa balls in helps women tone their PCs—and enjoy more pleasurable orgasms. In other words, ben-wa balls are another way to do PC-strengthening Kegel exercises.
BDSM Toys
Any sex toy used in sexual play that explore giving or receiving intense sensation. BDSM toys include: whips, floggers, and riding crops, and are often used with bondage toys: gags, blindfolds, and restraints. They are used in erotic power games, where one lover plays dominant (the dom or top), while the other plays submissive (the sub or bottom). The myth is that BDSM revolves around pain. Actually, it’s all about trust. BDSM is primarily theater, a highly stylized form of erotic play that toys with intense sensations—sometimes pain—without hurting anyone. BDSM scenes are best worked out in detail beforehand, with a “stop” signal the bottom can invoke at any time he or she feels uncomfortable. The top should commit to honor the stop signal immediately. Because the submissive partner can invoke the “stop” signal at any time, the irony of BDSM is that the bottom is actually the one in control. When playing with BDSM, no one should ever feel threatened or get hurt.
Blindfold
An eye shade that eliminates vision. Blindfolds are popular among those who enjoy BDSM, but they can be used enjoyably by couples who are not into erotic power games, by simply want to spice things up with very light dominance and submission. Placing a blindfold on a lover asserts power: I can take sight away from you. Accepting a blindfold means erotic surrender: I grant you this power over me. With sight temporarily eliminated, the bottom can focus more intently on the other erotic senses: touch, taste, smell, and hearing. For both lovers, a blindfold allows creative fantasies of inviting others to watch or join in. (Simulate “others” with dildos or other toys.) If you’re new to erotic power games, blindfolds can be a comfortable introduction. The bottom’s hands are not bound so he or she can always feel safe and remove the blindfold. For more advanced BDSM enthusiasts, a blindfold can be used along with other restraints. Scenes involving restraints should be worked out in detail beforehand, with a “stop” signal the bottom can invoke any time he or she feels uncomfortable. The top should honor the stop signal immediately. Because the bottom can invoke the “stop” signal at any time, the irony of BDSM is that the submissive partner is actually the one in control. When using blindfolds or restraints, the bottom should ever feel threatened or get hurt.
Blow-Up Doll
If you don’t have a real, live lover—or even if you do—you can inflate a male or female doll as a surrogate sex partner. Blow-up dolls are life-size and semi-realistic, with fairly realistic mouths, penises, vaginas, and anuses. Blow-up dolls are constructed from vinyl heavy enough to lie on top of. (But if vigorous use causes a leak, a repair kit is usually included. If not, use a bicycle tire patch.) Some female dolls have removable vaginas for easy washing and for separate use if you’d rather not use the entire doll. Some come with vibrating erotic openings for added pleasure. A doll can’t replace a real, live lover, but on the other hand, a doll never says, “Not tonight, dear….”
Body Stocking/Body Suit
Imagine lacy black stockings. Now imagine them covering not just the legs, but most of the body. When people think of lingerie, they usually envision teddies, babydolls, or sexy bra and panty sets. Body suits are a little different—which makes them all the more alluring. Most similar to hose, they’re figure-hugging, so they accent all of her beautiful curves. They come sheer, semi-sheer, or lacy, obscuring the breasts and vulva, but only a little. You can still see the woman’s loveliness. If you’re a man or woman who enjoys sexy black stockings, you’ll probably enjoy seeing your lover in a body stocking. And if you’re a woman who likes to slowly unroll stockings for your lover, or a man who likes removing stockings, a body suit gives you more to peel—and reveal.
Bondage
Erotic play that involves restraint—one person ties up the other. Now often called BDSM. Scenes involving restraints are best worked out in detail beforehand, with a “stop” signal the bottom can invoke any time he or she feels uncomfortable. The top should honor the stop signal immediately. Because the bottom can invoke the “stop” signal at any time, the irony of bondage is that the submissive partner is actually the one in control. When using restraints, the bottom should ever feel threatened or get hurt.
Bondage Toys
Any sex toy that restrains the limbs or senses or simulates this. Bondage toys include: gags, blindfolds, and restraints. They are used in erotic power games, where one lover plays dominant (the top), while the other plays submissive (the bottom). Scenes involving restraints are best worked out in detail beforehand, with a “stop” signal the bottom can invoke any time he or she feels uncomfortable. The top should honor the stop signal immediately. Because the bottom can invoke the “stop” signal at any time, the irony of bondage is that the submissive partner is actually the one in control. When using restraints, the bottom should ever feel threatened or get hurt.
Bridal Lingerie
While most lingerie is naughty black or sexy red, bridal lingerie is as white as a wedding gown. Bridal white lingerie combines the virginal innocence of a classic wedding gown with the hot sexual allure of fashions that say: Feast your eyes upon me. I’m all yours. The combination gives a whole new meaning to: Here comes the bride (and groom). Bridal lingerie, in satin or lace, includes white teddies, baby dolls, gowns, camisoles, and bra and panty sets. It’s the perfect gift for anniversaries, second honeymoons, or anytime you and your honey want to recapture the romance and sensuality of your wedding night.
Bullet
A tiny vibrator meant to be inserted in the vagina or anus. Bullets are thumb-size cylinders typically with two rounded ends. They are attached by wire to a battery pack. Bullets can be worn under clothing so you can give yourself a sexy buzz any time you wish. Some come with panties that have a pocket allowing the bullet to nestle up against the clitoris for added pleasure. Bullets are also good sex toys for traveling. They pack easily and don’t take up much room, but still provide a nice buzz.
Bustier
A lingerie item that accents the breasts. Think sexy bra—only more so. Fashioned from lace, satin, or a combination of the two, usually with underwires, some bustiers reveal the upper half of the breasts, while covering the nipples and what’s below them along with the midriff. Others cover the outsides of the breast, but feature a plunging V-cut design that reveals the insides and accents cleavage. And some provide shelf-like support for the breasts allowing them to project outward either partially covered or fully bared. Most bustiers include garter straps to attach to stockings. Bustiers can be fun no matter what a woman’s breast size. In large-breasted women, they highlight abundance. In those who are small, bustiers present the breasts in an alluring way that invites playful enjoyment.
Butt Plug
See Anal Dildo.
Clip Chains
A delicate two-end or three-end chain with clips that attach to anything you want to visually highlight or sensually arouse. Got some erotic body parts you’d like to link together? Perhaps the nipples, labia, or scrotum. You can do this with a two- or three-end clip chain. Some women say that they feel more erotic sensation in the clitoris when their nipples are stimulated at the same time. A three-end clip chain can excite all three simultaneously. Clip chains originated as BDSM toys because the clips can provide intense sensation. But many chains are designed with easily adjustable clips so they can be enjoyed by just about anyone.
Clitoral Stimulator
A toy designed to come in contact with the clitoris and erotically stimulate it. A variety of clitoral stimulators are available: strap-on “butterflies,” classic dildos or vibrators with extra clitoral nubs, and penis rings with clitoral extensions. For an estimated 75 percent of women, intercourse does not provide enough direct clitoral stimulation to trigger orgasm. Clitoral stimulators to the rescue. Butterflies are saucer-like vibrators that rest on the clitoris. They are typically held in place by straps placed around the hips. Some are remote controlled, allowing a woman’s lover to give her wonderful sensations at the touch of a button. Clitoral nubs on dildos and vibrators allow simultaneous direct clitoral stimulation and vaginal insertion. And penis rings with clitoral-stimulating extensions, enhance intercourse by allowing penile movement in the vagina to provide direct clitoral stimulation at the same time.
Corset
A lingerie item that tightens around the waist, making it look smaller. When the waist looks smaller, the breasts and hips look fuller and more sensually curvy and erotic. Corsets were invented centuries ago to be worn under the dresses of that era. Today, they are a type of lingerie. Most corsets cover the area from the hips to the upper abdomen. (Some cover the breasts). They are cinched tight with laces, ties, or hooks. Most have garter straps to hold up stockings. Corsets are delightfully erotic as stand-alone lingerie items. But because they are fastened tight, they are a favorite among those who enjoy BDSM play.
Crotchless Panties
Panties with a vertical opening that invites access to the vulva and vagina. A woman in panties can look so sexy that some lovers feel it’s a shame to have to remove them to reveal her genitals. With crotchless panties, you don’t have to. They open right where you want to look—or touch, or gently insert a finger, tongue, penis, or sex toy. Some crotchless panties are always open. Others have laces or zippers. All accommodate cunnilingus and vaginal intercourse.
Cyberskin™
A plastic material with a surprisingly realistic flesh-like feel, often used on the surface of vibrators and dildos. Close your eyes and touch a real penis. Then touch a Cyberskin dildo. The two feel remarkably similar. Many women prefer life-like Cyberskin to other sex-toy materials (latex, silicone, or jelly).
Delay Cream/Desensitizer
Anesthetic cream that helps some men delay orgasm/ejaculation when applied to the penis. Desensitizers are a quick fix for the common male problem of premature ejaculation. Just apply some and the topical anesthetic numbs the penis, which helps some men last longer. However, these products change the taste of the penis, and if the cream rubs off on the women, it can numb her genitals as well. For most men, delay products are unnecessary.
Dildo
Any cylindrical or penis-shaped object used for erotic stimulation, typically inserted into the vagina. Dildos may be realistic-looking penis surrogates made from latex, jelly, silicone, or Cyberskin. Or they may be more abstract, arty plastic cylinders with one tapered end. Some dildos vibrate. Others do not. Some are two-headed, for simultaneous use by two people, or for insertion into two erotic openings of the same person. Some have cured ends for stimulation of the G-spot. For safety and greatest enjoyment, always use plenty of lubricant with inserted sex toys.
Double Dildo (Double Dong)
Any dildo that has two penis-like heads, one on each end. Double dildos can be used vaginally by two women, or in two orifices by the same person. They are much larger than even the largest penis, so for those excited by size, they inspire fantasy as well as pleasure.
Erection Ring (Cock Ring)
Any rubber donut-shaped device or leather strap that tightly encircles the erect penis. Rings can be used for aesthetic enhancement, but typically they are used to help maintain erection. They don’t work miracles, but they can help a little. Blood circulates in and out of the penis both when it’s flaccid and erect. The arteries that carry blood into the penis run through the center of the organ, so during erection, as blood fills the penis’ spongy erectile tissues, a ring doesn’t keep blood out. However, the veins that carry blood out of the penis run closer to its outer skin. As the penis expands in erection, these veins naturally get somewhat compressed, which restricts blood outflow (but does not stop it). A ring restricts outflow a bit more (but doesn’t stop it.). The net effect is somewhat greater blood build-up in the penis, and a slightly firmer erection.
In addition, rings have a psychological effect. Nerves control how much the penile arteries expand to carry extra blood into the penis. These nerves—and the arteries as well—are sensitive to stress. If a man feels stressed, his erection are likely to be less full and firm. But if a man believes that a ring helps maintain his erection, he’s likely to feel reassured and relax, which helps usher more blood into the penis whether or not he uses a ring.
There are two kinds of erection rings—adjustable and nonadjustable. The former are easier to keep from becoming uncomfortably tight.
Extender
Imagine a condom with a 2 to 3-inch dildo on the end. Extenders elongate the erect penis, allowing deeper insertion. The sleeve that fits over the penis is considerably thicker than a condom. This is necessary for the toy to say on. Extenders are easily washable and reusable. While it can be great fun to play with having a longer penis, be careful when using one for vaginal insertion. The extension may bang into the back of the vagina, the cervix, or the bladder. Many women find this uncomfortable. We suggest the woman-on-top position with the penis still. Let her sit down on it and discover what’s most comfortable for her. Extenders are also known as a PPA’s— prosthetic penis attachments.
Fetish Wear
Any item of leather, latex, or PVC clothing intended to stimulate erotic excitement. They’re sexy, black (usually), figure-hugging, and light many people’s erotic fire. They’re the lingerie usually associated with BDSM: supple leather bra and crotchless panty sets, oh-so-tight latex bikini briefs and panties, studded leather G-strings and jockstraps, shiny PVC push-up bras, lace-up black leather miniskirts, breast-baring leather corsets, and much more.
Flogger
A whip with more than one strand. Think cat-o-nine-tails. A whip has one long strand. A flogger has many short ones. Because the strands are short, floggers are easier to control than whips. Therefore, they are safer. They also strike a wider area. When using floggers or whips, be sure to pre-arrange a “stop” signal, one that the person holding the toy honors immediately. No one should ever feel threatened or get hurt during loving sex play.
French Tickler
A condom with little extras: nubs or other attachments that provide extra stimulation for the erotic opening the tickler-covered penis enters. French ticklers can provide extra stimulation for many parts of the body: the vaginal lips during intercourse; the clitoris if the penis slides up against it; the mouth, lips, and tongue during oral sex; the breasts when they are pressed together and the penis slides between them; or the anus during anal intercourse. When using a tickler in the vagina, on the clitoris, between the breasts, and especially in the anus, be sure to use plenty of lubricant.
French ticklers are sold as novelties. They are not manufactured to the same government specifications as condoms, and should not be relied upon for contraception or prevention of sexually transmitted diseases.
While ticklers can enhance vaginal intercourse for women, their use during intercourse may not provide enough direct clitoral stimulation to allow the woman to express orgasm. Most women need direct clitoral stimulation for that.
G-spot Stimulator
Any vibrator or dildo with a bent end to facilitate G-spot stimulation. The G-spot is an area on the front wall of the vagina (the top when a woman lies on her back). When women are sexually aroused and this area is pressed or rubbed, many—but by no means all—women experience intense erotic sensations. To stimulate the G-spot, a lover can insert the index or middle finger, and hook it to rub the front of the vaginal wall. But women cannot do this to themselves, and some prefer a G-spot stimulator to a lover’s fingers. G-spot stimulators are most comfortable when used with plenty of lubricant.
G-String
The skimpiest possible underwear—two tiny triangular loincloths, one covering the front, the other the back, held together by strings. In classic striptease shows, performers wore panties, and under them G-strings to provide one more layer that could be stripped off before baring all. G-strings have emerged from strip shows to become a popular item of home erotic “undressing up.” G-string loincloths come in lace, satin, leather, and other fabrics. Some have printed messages, for example, Happy Birthday. They are erotic and risqué, while still leaving something to the imagination.
Gag
A toy that eliminates speech by covering or filling the mouth and tying behind the head. Some gags are simply piece of cloth or leather that cover the mouth. Others include balls (the size of golf balls) that fill the mouth in addition to covering it. Gags do not eliminate sound, just words. The person wearing the gag can still moan and grunt. Gags are used in BDSM play, where one lover plays dominant (the top), while the other plays submissive (the bottom). If you’re new to erotic power games, gags can be a comfortable introduction. The bottom’s hands and feel are not bound so he or she can always remove the gag. For more advanced BDSM enthusiasts, a gag can be used with restraints. Scenes involving restraints are best worked out in detail beforehand, with a “stop” signal the bottom can invoke any time he or she feels uncomfortable. With the bottom gagged, the stop signal cannot be a word. Be sure to negotiate a clear nonverbal stop signal if one lover is gagged. The top should honor the stop signal immediately. Because the bottom can invoke the “stop” signal at any time, the irony of bondage is that the bottom is actually the one in control. When using restraints, no one should ever feel threatened or get hurt.
Harness
A plastic or leather device worn around the hips and pelvis used to house a strap-on dildo or butt plug. Harnesses may be used by either men or women on either men or women. Some men use harnesses to play with penis size by using a strap-on that’s larger than their own penis. Other men have erection problems and use a strap-on as a substitute. Women who use harnesses typically want to play with gender roles. Porn videos often depict women using harnesses and strap-ons for oral, vaginal, or anal intercourse.
Jelly
A rubbery material used to in the manufacture of some sex toys. It has the texture of gummy candies. Some people prefer jelly toys to latex, hard plastic, silicone, or Cyberskin™. It’s a matter of personal preference. But jelly toys have a soft suppleness that many sex toy users enjoy.
Kits
A box containing a standard 7” vibrator, plus various erotic attachments that slip over it. Some kits focus on vaginal pleasure, with large French tickler and extender attachments. Others focus on anal pleasure, with probes and plugs of various shapes and sizes. Kits are an economical way to buy a half dozen toys for the price of one or two.
Latex
The rubbery plastic commonly used in the manufacture of condoms and sex toys. Latex is strong, stretchy, and accepts water-based sexual lubricants well, allowing latex sex toys to slide easily into erotic openings. However, some people are allergic to latex, and develop a rash or itching. If you notice these symptoms, switch to sex toys made from either jelly, hard plastic, silicone, or Cyberskin™. If you use latex sex toys, don’t lubricate them with petroleum products (Vaseline). Petroleum causes latex to deteriorate.
Lubricant
Any emollient applied to the skin or to a sex toy that increases its slipperiness. Lubricants enhance the comfort and pleasure of masturbation, vaginal intercourse, sex-toy use, and especially anal sex. It takes only seconds to demonstrate the value of sexual lubricants. Run a finger across your dry lips and note how it feels. Then lick your lips and repeat. Now, didn’t that feel more sensual? In sex, the wetter, the better. When sex toys or the genitals are well lubricated, they experience more sensuality from touch and they slide together more easily and comfortably. Lubricants can be water-based (Probe, Astroglide, Slippery Stuff, etc.) oil-based (vegetable oils), silicone-based (Eros Classic Bodyglide), or petroleum based (Vaseline, Anal Lube). The myth is that the vagina self-lubricates copiously as the woman becomes sexually aroused. In fact, many women don’t produce much self-lubrication even when highly aroused, especially after menopause. In addition, women who usually self-lubricate well may not under some circumstances. Lubricants are a quick, convenient, safe, inexpensive enhancement for vaginal and anal play.
Marital Aid
A euphemism for “sex toy.” Several decades ago, when married people were the only ones culturally permitted to have sex, sex toys were only considered appropriate for use in marriage, hence “marital aids.” Of course, millions of people who are not married have sex and use sex toys. “Marital aid” is a holdover from the era when the term “sex” was not used in polite company, and when sex toys were viewed as scandalously fringe items. This is no longer the case, but the term “marital aid” still survives.
Mask
Face coverings are used to heighten erotic excitement during BDSM play. They are placed by the dominant partner (top) and worn by the submissive partner (bottom). Some have eyeholes. Other do not and function as both masks and blindfolds. Some cover the mouth and function as gags. If you’re new to erotic power games, masks can be a comfortable introduction. The bottom’s hands and feet are not bound so he or she can always remove them. For more advanced BDSM players, a mask can be used along with restraints. BDSM scenes are best worked out in detail beforehand, with a “stop” signal the bottom can invoke any time he or she feels uncomfortable. If a mask is also a gag, a clear nonverbal stop signal should be negotiated. The top should honor the stop signal immediately. Because the bottom can invoke the “stop” signal at any time, the irony of bondage is that the bottom is actually the one in control. In loving sex play, no one should ever feel threatened or get hurt.
Massage Oil
A lotion applied to the whole body to enhance the comfort and sensuality of massage. Massage oils are emollients that moisturize the skin allowing massaging hands to glide more easily. Massage oils may also be used as sexual lubricants. However, some people find them too oily, and they may irritate sensitive genital skin. Sexual lubricants tend to work better on—and in—the genitals. But sexual lubricants dry out faster than massage oils and don’t work as well on nongenital area of the body.
Massager
A euphemism for “vibrator.” Any vibrator can be used to massage sore muscles…and any massager can be used erotically. During the early 20th century, shortly after vibrators were invented, several major catalogues, for examples, Sears Roebuck, carried them, but called them “massagers.” Incredibly, even then, the copy hinted at their erotic use, calling them “every woman’s friend.” They still are—and couples’ friend, too.
Men’s Masturbator
Also known as a sleeve or penis sleeve, masturbators are sex toys used by men to enhance masturbation. Most are crafted to look like vaginas. A hand can be dandy, but a masturbator grips the penis differently, allowing the man to vary the sensations he experiences during masturbation. Some masturbators vibrate for extra-intense stimulation. Some are made from latex, others from jelly, silicone, or Cyberskin™. All are easily washable.
Nipple Clamps/Nipple Clips
Imagine screw-on or clip-on earrings, but substitute the nipples for the ear lobes. Nipple toys decorate this beautiful part of the male or female anatomy, and provide steady pressure that can produce deliciously erotic sensations. Nipple toys can be worn and enjoyed by both women and men. Some nipple clips screw on, the screw mechanism allowing you or a lover to provide just the right amount of pressure. Others look like hoop earrings and can be worn discreetly under clothing so just you and your honey know they’re on. Some come wired for attachment to a vibrator for intense erotic sensations. And others are linked by a chain for decoration, or to lead the wearer around by the nipples.
Pearls
See Anal Beads
Penis Pump
A device that creates a near-vacuum around the penis. This temporarily coaxes more blood into the organ, resulting in a somewhat larger, firmer erection—or partial or complete erections in men who otherwise cannot have them. No mechanical device can permanently enlarge a penis. But for men or couples who enjoy playing with size, a penis pumps can provide temporary enhancement. The man inserts his penis into the pump cylinder, then uses the hand bulb to evacuate most of the air, creating a near-vacuum. These conditions stretch the penis somewhat. The effect subsides after the penis leaves the cylinder, but many men can retain the extra firmness long enough to enjoy intercourse.
Penis pumps were originally developed by doctors to help men with erectile dysfunction produce erections firm enough for intercourse. Their use as sex toys came later. Many research teams have studied the effectiveness of penis pumps for men with impotence caused by such conditions as diabetes and paraplegia. They work reasonably well—assuming a custom fit for a good vacuum seal.
Penis pumps are safe when used as directed. We are unaware of any reports of injury from them. Of course, misuse might cause problems, so follow the directions, and use your pump carefully.
Penis Sleeve
See Men’s Masturbator
Pheromones
Perfumes specially formulated to attract lovers and enhance sex. When animals go into heat, they attract the opposite sex chemically by releasing special aromatic chemicals called pheromones. Over the past 20 years or so, scientists have discovered that humans also release pheromones when sexually aroused and respond erotically when they encounter pheromones’ subtle scents. Human pheromones have been identified and synthesized in laboratories so they can be produced in commercial quantities. Several perfumes, colognes, and massage oils contain pheromones. The fragrance is subtle, but some studies suggest that the effect is real.
Play Wear
A general term for any type of lingerie. Great sex is a form of play, so it should come as no surprise that the clothing that complements great sex is called play wear. Whether it’s a purple satin come-hither gown, a lace-trimmed bridal teddy, a leather jockstrap, a latex bra and panty set, or a push-up bra, play wear can add variety, spice, and enchantment to your erotic play.
PPA
A “prosthetic penis attachment.” Imagine a condom with a 2 to 3-inch dildo on the end. Extenders elongate the erect penis, allowing deeper insertion. The sleeve that fits over the penis is considerably thicker than a condom. This is necessary for the toy to say on. Extenders are easily washable and reusable. While it can be great fun to play with having a longer penis, be careful when using one for vaginal insertion. The extension may bang into the back of the vagina, the cervix, or the bladder. Many women find this uncomfortable. We suggest the woman-on-top position with the penis still. Let her sit down on it and discover what’s most comfortable for her. PPA’s are also known as “extenders.”
PVC
The abbreviation for polyvinyl chloride, a shiny, black or purple plastic fabric used in fetish lingerie. Tired of leather and latex? PVC is another option that some lovers find arousing and fun. In black or purple, PVC playwear provides a whole new erotic look. It feels deliciously different than leather or latex.
Realistic
Any sex toy modeled on an actual person. Some dildos and vibrators are modeled on the penises of male porn stars. Some masturbators and dolls are modeled on female porn stars. Nothing like a little realism to make sexual fantasies feel—well, more realistic. If you’ve ever imagined having sex with a porn star, this is about as close as you’ll probably get.
Restraints
Any device used to limit movement (ropes, ribbons, wrist or ankle cuffs) or reduce sensory awareness (blindfolds). Often used in BDSM play. Scenes involving restraints are best worked out in detail beforehand, with a “stop” signal the restrained person can invoke at any time he or she feels things have gone beyond the person’s comfort limit. The restrainer should commit to honor the stop signal immediately. Because the submissive partner can invoke the “stop” signal at any time, the irony of bondage is that the partner being restrained is actually the one in control. When using restraints, no one should ever feel threatened or get hurt.
Riding Crop
A small equestrian whip. Riding crops have long flexible handles and one or two short whipping strands. When using crops—or floggers or whips—be sure to pre-arrange a “stop” signal, one that the person holding the toy honors immediately. No one should ever feel threatened or get hurt in loving sex play.
S&M
Erotic play that involves domination and submission, also known as power play or BDSM. One lover plays dominant (the dom or top), while the other plays submissive (the sub or bottom). Scenes involving restraints are best worked out in detail beforehand, with a “stop” signal the bottom can invoke any time he or she feels uncomfortable. The top should honor the stop signal immediately. Because the bottom can invoke the “stop” signal at any time, the irony of bondage is that the submissive partner is actually the one in control. When using restraints, the bottom should ever feel threatened or get hurt.
Sexual Aid/Sex Toy
General terms for any device used for sexual stimulation and enhancement. However, in current usage, x-rated videos, erotic books, lingerie, and how-to sex guides are not considered as sexual aids/sex toys, even though they are used for erotic stimulation and enhancement. A sexual aid/sex toy is a device or appliance used directly on the body.
Silicone
A material used to make sex toys. It’s costly, so silicone toys are more expensive than latex, jelly, hard plastic or Cyberskin™. They’re a good option if you’re allergic to latex.
Strap-On
A dildo specially designed to fit into a plastic or leather harness worn around the hips and pelvis. Strap-ons allow more realistic intercourse than hand-held toys. Strap-ons may be used by either men or women on either men or women. Men who use them typically want to play with penis size by using a dildo that’s larger than their own penis. Women who use strap-ons typically want to play with gender roles.
S&M Toys
See BDSM toys
Sleeves
Artificial erotic openings that can accommodate the entire length of the erect penis. Most sleeves look like vaginas, but some are crafted to resemble the mouth. Sleeves are mostly used by men during masturbation. They may be also used during partner sex. Some include built-in vibrators for extra-intense sensations. For comfort and erotic intensity, apply a sexual lubricant to both the sleeve and the penis before insertion.
Swing
It hangs from the ceiling like a porch swing, but it seats only one person, usually a woman, and the seat is designed to allow access to her vagina. Most swings hang from a steel spring and rotating eyebolt, inviting an amazing range of new and exciting sexual positions. The seat, back, and stirrups are padded for comfort. An instruction manual suggests many sensual positions.
Teddy
A one-piece item of women’s lingerie that highlights the breasts, genitals, and buttocks while covering them. Think of a one-piece women’s bathing suit—only in lace or satin or see-through fabric. Some teddies are cut very low to reveal most of the breasts. Others are cut high around the hips to reveal most of the buttocks and hint at the vulva. Some are open at the nipples, or have ties that open to reveal them. Others have snaps in the crotch that open to reveal the genitals.
Thong
An item of lingerie that resembles a bikini bathing suit bottom. Thongs provides less coverage than bikini panties but more than G-strings. They cradle the vulva and accent the thighs and buttocks in a uniquely erotic way. Thongs come in lace, leather, satin, and other fabrics. They are available alone or in thong-and-bra sets. Some baby dolls include thongs.
Titilizer
A chain with a wire loop at each end that slips over the nipples, adorning them. The wire loops are adjustable for a comfortable fit. The chain hangs between the breasts, drawing attention to them. Can be worn under clothing.
Tongue
A vibrator shaped like an extended human tongue that can move like one. Tongues are typically used for clitoral stimulation, but may also be used vaginally or anally. The tip of the tongue can move up and down or around in circles, often at variable speeds. Most are battery powered.
Vaginal Simulator
See Men’s Masturbator or Sleeve
Vibrator
Any sex toy that uses electric power (batteries or wall current) to create erotic sensations. Imagine touching a washing machine or dryer while they’re in operation. That’s how most vibrators feel. Vibrators are the most popular type of sex toy. They may be made from a number of materials: latex, hard plastic, jelly, silicone, and Cyberskin™. They come large and small (bullet), single speed or variable, shaped like penises or vaginas, or attached to nipple clips or clitoral butterflies. Battery powered vibrators are portable but sacrifice power. Others use wall current, providing power but sacrificing portability. If you want to use a vibrator around water—in a pool, hot tub, bath, or shower—be sure to use one that’s waterproof.
Waterproof Toys
Vibrators that can be used in the bath, shower, or hot tub safely. For many couples, vibrators enhance sex. So does bathing together. But vibrators and bathing don’t mix because of the risk of short circuits and electrocution from taking an electrical item into the water. Waterproof toys to the rescue. Waterproof toys are specially designed to be safe in and around water.
Whip
Any toy used for striking another in BDSM play. “Whip” is a general term for any toy used to strike another—typically on the buttocks, but elsewhere as well—and trigger erotic sensations. Whips come in a variety of styles. A classic whip has one long striking strand. A flogger has many short ones. And a riding crop has a long flexible handle and one or two short strands. When using any whip, be sure to pre-arrange a “stop” signal, one that the person holding the toy honors immediately. No one should ever feel threatened or get hurt in loving sex play.
More great, useful sex information from Michael Castleman, the world’s most popular sexuality writer.
