I have always enjoyed anal sex activities since my early teens. Now I’m old and widowed. My fantasies during masturbation always revolve around having some form of scat activity with the woman. Is this extreme fantasy unusual? Or is it more common than reported due to shame and humiliation?
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I don’t know how common scat fantasies are, but I think you’re right—those who have them may decide to keep such fantasies to themselves.
Some people read deep psychological meanings into erotic fantasies, and if the fantasies are out of the ordinary, they may feel concerned. But the sexologists I respect explain that erotic fantasies are like meditation. In meditation, all sorts of strange thoughts course through the mind, thoughts the person meditating may find odd or disturbing or worse. Meditation teachers say: Notice your thoughts without judging them. Your thoughts are not YOU. They’re just thoughts. Notice them then gently dismiss them from your mind. They don’t “mean” anything.
That’s how I suggest viewing your scat fantasies. In fantasy, everything is permitted and nothing is wrong. Fantasy allows us to dream of experiences we’d never want to play out in real life. You’ve enjoyed anal play for many years. Your scat fantasies grow out of your lifelong interest in anal play. If you want to delve into your fantasies’ possible meanings, I’m sure you could spend a lot of time and money on psychotherapy to try to figure this out—if you ever figure it out. But personally, I wouldn’t go that route. I’d simply accept my fantasies and try to enjoy them. In fantasy, all is permitted and nothing is wrong.