I am 73 years old with a raging sex drive. My wife is no longer interested in sex. I masturbate almost daily and on occasion I need it twice in a day. Have not felt that way since my teens. My orgasm are mostly phenomenal. But I wish I could have sex with my wife and I have been contemplating going outside the marriage. But I’ve never cheated in 38 years of marriage. I occasionally masturbate to porn. Is this behavior strange or normal?
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“Normal” has two connotations—typical and healthy. At age 73, daily masturbation is not typical, so it that sense it’s not normal. But it’s perfectly healthy to masturbate, and if you feel the need once a day or even more, as far as sexologists are concerned, you’re normal. There’s nothing wrong with masturbation, as long as it doesn’t interfere with your life (work or maintaining a relationship).
I sympathize with your wish to make love with your wife. Given her refusal to have sex, I’m not surprised that you’re considering extra-marital options. But you seem proud of your 38 years of monogamy, so before you step out, you might consider consulting a sex therapist, ideally with your wife, to discuss the lack of sex in your marriage. If your wife won’t accompany you to sex therapy, then I’d suggest that you go solo to vent and perhaps to get some ideas of how to proceed in marital negotiations. For more about sex therapy—how it works, what it costs‚ read my article. To find a sex therapist near you, visit the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, the Therapists, the Society for Sex Therapy and Research, or the American Board of Sexology.
But if you enjoy masturbating daily or more frequently, there’s nothing wrong, strange, or harmful doing so.
I have been masturbating at least twice a day since I learned how when I was 12. I am now 73. It is fun and causes me no problems. My wife (she’s 70) also masturbates. We both tell each other to do it as much as we want to.
Reeve