Unhappy senior man close up

I am 77. For a few years now, I no longer feel the thrilling high of orgasm. Docs tell me this is normal! Is it really?


  • Michael Castleman says:

    I disagree with your doctor. Pleasurable orgasms are possible at your age. I think you face two issues—having orgasms at all, and having them feel as thrilling as they once did.

    About the first, having orgasms at all, here’s what I suggest:
    • First, believe that you CAN have them.
    • Start solo. Arrange a time and place where you can focus on nothing but your pleasure.
    • Stroke to any fantasies that turn you on, no matter what their content. In fantasy, everything is permitted and nothing is wrong.
    • Use lubricant to enhance sensation. It’s available over the counter at pharmacies. Look near the condoms.
    • If you’d like to use visual aids—erotic stories, pornography—that’s fine. Whatever floats your sexual boat.
    • Then invest time. With age, it takes men longer to become aroused, and once aroused, to have orgasms. Give it time. And in addition to enhancing sensation, lube also helps prevent penis chafing with extended stroking.

    To increase the intensity, or as you put it, the thrill of your orgasms, please understand that orgasm intensity is a function of the strength of your pelvic floor muscles, the ones that run between the legs. With age, the pelvic muscles lose strength. As they become flabby, orgasms feel less pleasurable. Fortunately, the pelvic muscles can be strengthened at any age. Just practice Kegel exercise a few times a day for a few months. Kegels are simple, easy, and private. They can be done any time anywhere. To learn how, search this site. Or consult my book Sizzling Sex for Life. Or search Kegel exercises on the Internet. It usually takes a few months of daily Kegeling to notice a difference. But eventually, I bet you enjoy more intense orgasms.

    I wish you sizzling sex for life.

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