What’s going on with me? I’m a 56-year-old man. The last couple of years I’ve noticed some erection problems, so I started taking Viagra. It’s helped, but now I’m ejaculating way before I want to. I haven’t had that problem in 20 years. And now I’m having more erection trouble, even with the Viagra. My wife is upset and so am I. Help!
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You’re not alone. It’s quite common for men in your situation to experience a recurrence of premature ejaculation. Rapid ejaculation usually results from emotional stress. You’re under stress about your erection situation, so I’m not surprised that when you raise one, your body decides to use it before you lose it.
Viagra is a fine drug, but has your doctor told you that it doesn’t always work? One of the main reasons for it not working is guess what–emotional stress or anything that distracts you from your erotic focus, for example worrying about your erections or rapid ejaculation. I urge you to make your lovemaking as relaxed as possible. Try taking a hot shower beforehand. Don’t use any alcohol before sex. During sex breathe deeply and focus on erotic fantasies, not on your erection situation or rapid ejaculation.
Beyond that, I suggest that you read my article on gaining ejaculatory control. It discusses the do-it-yourself sex therapy program that has proven around 90% effective at any age.
If the article doesn’t resolve things, then I suggest a brief course of sex therapy. For more about sex therapy, read my article on it. To find a sex therapist near you, contact the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists, the Society for the Scientific Study of Sex, or the American Board of Sexology.